Can there be anything more damaging in a relationship than for one to speak negatively behind the others back? In marriage vows alone, we promise ‘to honor’. Why then do married couples speak negatively about each other to their friends, or worse, run them down in front of others. Are we that morbidly insecure to do such things? Personally, I would much rather want to be lifted up behind my back than to be tore down.
James warns us that the church is also a relationship. Each individual member is actually a member of a body full of other members. Each member is responsible to lift up rather than tear down. We have a relationship that is heavenly in its creation and destined to be eternal.
In chapter 4 verse 11 James says— “Speak not evil one of another…” We are not to slander or defame. May I add, we should not allow it either. I don’t want to hear it. I don’t want to have any part of it. Why? Because the scripture here straight up said— do not do it. This would include: divulging secrets or exposing things (even if they are true); making up and spreading lies about others; cutting down others; derogatory, critical, or slanderous statements of others. These are all prohibited by God.
To slander seems easier than encouraging a person. Obviously, we should chose to encourage and not slander. Why… Because you are related. The word “brethren” explains how we that are saved are all related. We have the same Father through Jesus. This begs the question… Should we say anything slanderous to anyone? What about those who aren’t believers? Well, do you want them to have what you have? Speak kindly then. In fact, Colossians 4.5 states— “Walk in wisdom toward them that are without, redeeming the time.” This doesn’t mean we shouldn’t confront offense and sin— in the way the Bible tells us. There are some though, who even take pleasure in making known the faults of others. That’s just another form of judgment on those whom we should stick closest to. It’s also just another sign of the insecurities screaming out from within.
Why should we chose encouragement? Because you are judging God’s Word. “He that speaketh evil of his brother, and judgeth his brother, speaketh evil of the law, and judgeth the law” (11b). Which law? The law of Moses says, “Thou shalt not go up and down as a tale-bearer among thy people” (Leviticus. 19.16). It is forbidden for a believer. The law of Christ is— “Judge not, that you be not judged” (Matthew 7.1). It is forbidden. A slander towards a fellow believer is therefore condemning the law of God and the commandment of Christ. Ouch!
A detailed study of James would reveal that these ‘christians’ were apt to speak hard things of each other, because of their differences about preferences. Sound familiar? It’s like a page from the playbook of 20th and 21st century church. In Romans 14 Paul addresses the issue and explains that the Bible leaves some things as preferences on purpose. Places where it doesn’t say anything at all about a subject or is left unclear, leave it that way. The legalistic, hard-nosed, christian, will try to hold people to things not necessarily found in the Bible at all. People can come to a place where they judged the carnality or spirituality of other christians based upon their personal preferences. Legislating people into maturity never works. James like Paul says: if you censure and condemn a believer for not agreeing with you in those things which the Bible has left unclear, then you censure and condemn the Bible.
Do you want a lesson that seems completely counterintuitive? Here is how you deal with someone who isn’t in-line… If they break the law of God, leave the law to judge them. That’s right… it’s not your responsibility to expose them, run them down, or let everyone else know. It’s actually a heinous evil, because we forget our place. We are still in need of mercy and no better or worse than anyone else. We all ought to be “doers of the word” (James 1.22); instead we set ourselves above it, as if we were to be judges of others. The believer who is guilty of this sin is labeled here “A Judge”; he assumes an office and a place that does not belong to him, and he will be judged by the real Judge for this ‘sin’ of presumption. I have noticed in myself though, most who are ready to be Judges of others generally fail at the most simplest obedience to the Word?
Why should we choose encouragement? Because you are judging God. God is the law-giver. “There is one Lawgiver, who is able to save, and to destroy: who art thou that judgest another?” (12). God is still to be acknowledged as the supreme Lawgiver, who only can give law to the conscience, and who alone is to be absolutely obeyed. David said in Psalm 19.9— “The fear of the Lord is clean, enduring for ever: the judgments of the Lord are true and righteous altogether.” Since God is the Lawgiver, if we censure and condemn our brethren for not agreeing with us, then we censure and condemn the Bible, as if it is incomplete, but we also censure and condemn the giver of the Bible, Jesus, saying He is incomplete and not perfect in what He has and will do.
We are not God. We are not equipped to make a righteous judgement of someone else when we aren’t even equipped to judge ourselves. “Therefore thou art inexcusable, O man, whosoever thou art that judgest: for wherein thou judgest another, thou condemnest thyself; for thou that judgest doest the same things” (Romans 2.1).
Get radical about it— “Let all…evil speaking, be put away from you, with all malice” (Ephesians 4.31) “Wherefore laying aside…all evil speakings” (1 Peter 2.1).
Can’t get more clear than that.